The Rose & Cactus Parable: Finding the Goodness in Others
In our fast-paced world, making snap judgments is easy. We see a person, hear a snippet of a conversation, or observe a single action, and instantly, a story forms in our minds. But what if we’re missing a deeper truth? What if our own perceptions shadow the true essence of those around us? Now, what if we instead cultivate the art of active listening and go beyond those perceptions?
FREE: Essential Oils Sourcing Checklist
- Reduce essential oil supplier confusion
- Tips on what to look for in a quality supplier
- Become confident in your choices!
[This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase through one of these links I may earn a commission. This does not impact your price. For more information, please see our disclosure.]
In this Post:
The Parable of the Rose and the Cactus
In her upcoming book Floral Absolutes (get on the waitlist!), Candice Covington shares a beautiful parable that illustrates this human tendency.
The Prideful Rose
Once upon a time, a beautiful rose who was very full of herself would insult and tease her neighbor, the cactus, about his looks, without seeing who he truly was. The cactus, a sensible, self-contained fellow, remained quiet and knew his own worth. All the other plants nearby tried to make the rose see the truth, but she was too self-absorbed to even notice the things she and the cactus had in common (both being a prickly bunch), as well as the strengths that came from their differences.As summer wore on, the earth became dry, and there was no water left for the rose to drink. She quickly began to wilt. Her soft petals dried up, losing their lush color. Looking to the cactus, she saw a sparrow dip his beak into the cactus to drink some water. Though ashamed, the rose begged the cactus if she could have some water. The kindly cactus agreed, helping her through the difficult summer.
~Candice Covington, Floral Absolutes (2025)
The Art of Active Listening
The story of the rose and the cactus beautifully illustrates the power of our perceptions. The rose was so focused on the cactus’ outward appearance that she couldn’t see his inner strength, his resilience, or the life-sustaining water he held within.
How often do we do the same in our interactions? We might dismiss someone based on their demeanor, their differing opinions, or even their physical traits.
Communication isn’t just about speaking; it’s about the art of listening. It requires us to engage in active listening, a practice of truly hearing and understanding the person beneath the surface, not just their words.
The rose’s inability to engage in active listening prevented her from seeing the cactus’ true worth. The cactus, in his quiet self-containment, knew his own worth and didn’t let the rose’s barbs diminish him. He embodied self-awareness and grace.
The other plants tried to help the rose see the truth by highlighting their commonalities and strengths. This highlights the importance of community and the gentle nudges we can offer each other to broaden our perspectives.
Ultimately, the rose’s transformation came from a place of vulnerability and need. Only when she was truly in distress was she was able to humble herself and ask for help, finally recognizing the life-giving qualities of her neighbor, the cactus.
Active Listening to Cultivate an Open Mind & Heart
The rose and cactus parable encourages us to move beyond initial judgments and cultivate an open heart and mind. Imagine the richness we could discover in our relationships if we made a conscious effort to look for the “water” within others, instead of just focusing on their “prickles.”
This doesn’t mean ignoring healthy boundaries or overlooking genuine issues. Instead, it invites us to pause, to listen, and to seek understanding, especially when our initial reaction is judgmental.
What hidden strengths might someone possess? What shared experiences might connect us, despite apparent differences? How can essential oils help us navigate this challenge?
⭐Beyond the Surface Roll-On
- 10ml Roller bottle
- 1 drop Rose Absolute (Rosa spp.)
- 3 drops Pink Grapefruit essential oil (Citrus x paradisi)
- 2 drops Myrrh (Commiphora myrrha)
- 1 ml Prickly Pear Seed Oil (Opuntia ficus indica)
- Vanilla infused Jojoba Oil/Wax (Simmondsia chinensis, Vanilla planifolia)
🌺See my Recommended Suppliers below
Combine all ingredients in the roller bottle. Cap and rock to combine.
How to Use Beyond the Surface Roll-On
Use whenever you want to invite more openness, compassion, and understanding. Apply to pulse points (wrists, neck), over heart center, or behind ears. Then roll across palms and rub hands together. Cup hands over nose and inhale the aroma deeply, setting an intention to see the good in others and to connect from a place of genuine curiosity.
Energetic Support for Active Listening
- Rose Absolute: This high-vibrational oil connects directly to the heart, fostering compassion and unconditional love to help dissolve judgment and open the heart to truly see and hear others.
- Pink Grapefruit: This bright, uplifting oil promotes a sense of clarity and lightheartedness. It helps release feelings of self-doubt and negativity, creating a more positive and clear-minded state for listening without bias.
- Myrrh: As a sacred healing oleoresin, Myrrh provides deep grounding. It supports a feeling of security and helps heal emotional rifts in relationships, fostering a sense of trust.
- Prickly Pear Seed Oil: This lipid carrier oil, from the resilient cactus, represents inner strength and wisdom. It grounds the blend, providing a stable foundation that supports being present and centered during a conversation, even a “prickly” one.
- Vanilla-infused Jojoba: The sweet aroma of Vanilla is comforting and soothing to the soul. It helps to “sweeten” our perspective, making it easier to invite kindness and hear the truth in others.
May this story and this blend inspire you to look deeper, listen actively, and discover the beautiful, life-sustaining qualities in every “cactus” you encounter.
Christine’s Active Listening Shopping List
Get on the waitlist for Floral Absolutes and lock in your pre-order price! The scheduled release is September 23rd.
I got a sneak peek of this book and can’t wait to get my copy!
- 10ml Roller Bottles:
- Viviplex glass bottles with steel balls in Amber, Blue, & Green (on Amazon)
- Kessel frosted glass bottles with steel balls in Pink, Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Turquoise, Purple, & Black (on Amazon)
- Aromatics International, glass bottles with glass balls in Amber & Blue.
- Rose Absolute (Rosa spp.):
- Aromatics International, Absolute, organic
- Plant Therapy, Absolute, sustainable (Direct and Amazon).
- Pink/Rose Grapefruit essential oil (Citrus x paradisi):
- Myrrh oleoresin (Commiphora myrrha):
- Aromatics International, organic
- Plant Therapy, sustainable (Direct and Amazon).
- Vanilla Infused Jojoba Oil/Wax:
- Aromatics International, organic
- Make your own (instructions coming soon!).
- Prickly Pear Seed Oil (Opuntia ficus indica):
- Bella Terra Oils, cold-pressed, unrefined.
This information has not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. It is for educational purposes only.
All recipes provided are for personal use and are not designed for re-sale or large-scale manufacturing.
Please consult your doctor, naturopath, herbal practitioner, or other qualified health professional for medical advice and before starting any herbal regimen, particularly if you are pregnant or nursing, have any existing medical conditions, or are taking any medications.
Christine Pressler | Author, Certified Aromatherapist, Natural Skin Care Formulator
Christine is an avid reader, writer, lifetime learner, and proponent of self-care for better mental health and energy. She enjoys formulating bespoke aromatherapy, skin care, and herbal products to support her family, pets, friends, and clients. She also loves experimenting with recipes in the kitchen.💚 (Learn more >>)
